To Do List

So "Killer Robots" went underground for a few months, but I haven't given up on my literary ambitions, which still follow me around like resentful cat. I feed it little scraps of rough drafts, but most provide little nourishment and instead stink up my psyche like old fish heads. Sigh.

Most writers, of course, are familiar with the following vicious cycle, which nicely sums up my writing life over the last six months:

Act I

1. Set time aside for writing.
2. Make to do lists.
3. Read writing blogs.
4. Write in my blogs.
5. Actually put myself in front of a computer with time blocked out.
6. Discover I lack something vital: a file, a book, a set of notes, a printout.
7. Either find the item or work around it.
8. Get frustrated by the delay.
9. Finally give up.

Let's say I actually manage to get everything together at once and start working. then the cycle continues like this:

Act II

10. Work on writing. It's slow and awkward but I'm doing it.
11. Write regularly for a while.
13. Life intervenes: a vacation, an illness, a sick pet, an evil work project, etc.
14. Momentum breaks down.
15. Get frustrated.
16. Finally give up.
17. Brood about not writing
18: Repeat steps 1-9.
19: Repeat steps 10-17.
20: Go crazy.

So right now I'm on Step 7, and to prove I'm on Step 7, I have a To-Do List.

TO DO LIST

Project One: Completed science fiction novel "Killer Robots Never Work"
I've failed to find the analysis of the novel sent by the Pretty Nervous Writing Aardvarks (See Step Six) but will soldier on.
- rework synopsis and cover letter
- send it all out to the infinite array of markets for goofy science fiction novels with lots of geology.

Project Two: Completed short play "The Video Game."
The place I wanted to send this play closed its reading period April 30, but again, I soldier on.
- find new places to send my Video Game guys Frank and Ed.
- prepare "The Video Game."
- send play out.
- bonus: I found a playwriting group in Berkeley that meets once a month and I'm considering joining.

Project Three: Memoir in progress.
- keep writing all thoughts about memoir in notebook

Retired Project: Stealth Novel. Yes, I finished my NaNoWriMo novel last month! Read about it here.

So I'm sending out a play and a novel and writing a memoir, which seems a respectable To Do List. Feel free to place bets now on whether I'll be on Step 9 by July 4.

My New Collaborator

So I was eating dinner with my son Benny last night — frozen French fries and cold rotisserie chicken, hey, I was tired — and he asked me to read my Stealth Novel to him.

I've mentioned little bits about the novel since starting it in November, mostly to explain why I was tapping on a laptop in the corner after work while he plays video games. I update him every so often, telling him how the main character fell down a well, another has escaped a bad guy and a third character thinks he's corn. (Seriously, he has to be dragged in from the cornfield every night, shouting “Don’t break me from my stalk untimely!”) Benny thinks it's all very weird and regularly asks for updates.

So I started reading it to him and now he's making suggestions. My bad guy has to take a Swamp Test and Benny is helping me decide what this will involve. (Apparently pfu pfu birds, alligators and piranhas are essential components.)

I fretted a little a bit about this, because, well, I like to fret. I didn't think it would be a problem for Benny, since I skim over the blood and creepiness and sex stuff. Plus, it's good for a kid to see people do creative things. But I worried that perhaps it would screw up the writing a little bit. I mean, when I started this novel, it wasn't aimed at the seven-year-old kid audience. Would I start censoring myself and ruin its spooky, politically involved and somewhat disturbing tone?

But then I wrote a long scene in the bad guy's tent that's so um ... unsuitable that the only part I can read to Benny is where the two characters left through a melting wall. So I think I'm okay there.

I still plan to include the Swamp Test, though.

Updated Word Count: 33,000 words. Yay yay!

March 8: 36,396 words. Yay!

Stealth Novel Reborn AGAIN

Like a long friendship or an old datacenter, my NaNoWriMo novel never dies. I abandoned it in mid-November, then revived it on Jan. 3. Now it's Jan. 24 and I've opened the document again, hitting the 28,000 word mark this morning. All my characters are on the move: by foot, by wagon, by royal cavalcade. Where are they going? Well, I'd be the last to know. But it's going to involve a Swamp Test. (Yeah, you read that right.)

I have a new computer now, a13-inch Mac Powerbook, and a nifty backpack to put it in. So I'm all set to take my writing on the road myself. So far I've been mostly using the computer to check Facebook and stream movies from Netflix, but I have bigger goals than reruns of The Tudors — really.

After all, according to my automated NaNoWriMo Report Card, it's only Nov. 17 and it says: "You've fallen a bit behind, but one or two more big pushes and you should be back in business." I've saved all my NaNo pep talks, and the first one says:

Don't forsake your kingdom if it starts to seem silly or pointless, or you have no idea what your next order ought to be. Any command will do! Your characters, the weather, the birds and whales, the flow of the rivers, the path of destiny, and every last plot element all bend to your whim.

So I am once more a creator of worlds -- or at least one deeply neurotic world. At my current pace, I should be finished with my NaNo novel by January 2012 — kidding! Actually Valentine's Day is my goal so I can reward myself with a big box of chocolate (in addition to any other candy I may receive — I'm looking at you, Killer Robot Husband. Think dark chocolate cremes.)

Stealth Novel Reborn

So here I am on this squeaky-shiny first workday of 2011. Every year I fall into my chair on Jan. 3 or so, and every year I stare into space and piddle around for an hour before I can focus.

I'm at my place of paid employment, of course, but a successful workday should involve some fiction/memoir writing as well. To that end, I resurrected my NanoWrimo novel, which had to be abandoned halfway through when my father-in-law passed away suddenly. It's a pretty ridiculous novel, predictable and shamelessly derivative, and yet once you take a group of characters to 26,000 words, it's hard to cast them aside. So I zipped into work early (7:45 a.m.!) and spent the first hour reacquainting myself with this strange pack of goofballs, who are bouncing around their hapless land like billiard balls.

In other writing excitement, I'm casing Apple computers these days. I've almost settled on a 15" MacBook Pro. My current laptop is seven years old and barely wheezing along. I think a new computer will help me realize my 2011 Writing Resolution, which is — um — to actually Write.

Treadmill Journal: Week of August 1

Friday, August 6

1) Aug. 6, 2010. 10:33 a.m.
2) Write from 10:33 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.
3) Finish the damn Prologue.
4) Ron left our workplace laptop at home, so I'm using that. Wasted 15 minutes trying to pair the wireless keyboard and mouse. Spent another 15 searching for the cord to Benny's boombox so I don't have to listen to the loudly humming refrigerator. But then I started really kicking ass: by 12:30 I had added 1,000 words to the Prologue, and by 1:30 we were finally in San Francisco!
5) Tomorrow: start Chapter 1: "This House Won't Sell."

Saturday, August 7

1) Aug. 7, 2010. 9:21 a.m.
2) Write from 9:30 to 11:30 a.m..
3) Start Chapter 1
4) Lots of spinning wheels today. Wrote a few paragraphs of Chapter 1. Started reading old blog posts to refresh my memory and read all the way back to 2005. Started searching online for old articles I wrote in Michigan and discovered another Christine Kilpatrick who runs a touring company for Twilight fans. I hope people don't think it's me. Sent emails. Wrote a long blog post on how the distractions of the Internet keep us from focusing on our tasks. Hmmm, ironic.
5) Tomorrow: Keep plugging at Chapter 1.

Treadmill Journal: Week of July 25

Sunday, July 25

1) July 25, 2010. 2:38 p.m.
2) Write while Ron and Benny are at the park.
3) Work on Prologue. We've landed in San Francisco!
4) Wasted a lot of time trying to find the right version of the Prologue. Finally found it, then decided to rewrite it to sound like a diary. So the prologue begins like this:

Sunday, July 22, 2007
5 a.m.
I’m typing this by the light of my laptop in our empty living room. I’m sitting on the floor, of course — all the furniture is gone — beside a pile of luggage and the cat carrier. Ron paces the room and Benny sits in his car seat, clutching his stuffed sheep.

I have no idea why I ever thought I wanted to relive that morning. We almost missed our flight to San Francisco because I called the night before to change our cab reservation and the idiot on the phone typed 4:30 PM. Since then, I've stuck to my vow NEVER to use Bauer again. Just working on the Prologue made me anxious and it took three cookies and a Milky Way Midnight candy bar to calm down. I managed to get us on the plane to San Francisco before Ron and Benny returned from the park.
5) Tomorrow: Work on Prologue and try to avoid an anxiety attack.

Pretty Nervous Writing Aardvarks speak out!

When we last left our intrepid contestant, she was following a bunch of goddam picky guidelines to enter the PNWA contest. Reducing an 80,000-word manuscript to a 5-page synopsis was a real trip, and I considered just mailing the thing off a major accomplishment.

Which was a good thing, because "Killer Robots Never Work" didn't make the cut as a finalist. They did, however, send along two long critiques of the synopsis and first 50 pages.

Judge No. 1 was apparently drinking heavily when he/she read my stuff, because No. 1 loved the Killer Robots, thought the writing was wonderful (blush), liked the fake explosion of Aphrodite City and called it an "entertaining, interesting and imaginative story." No. 1 had some good suggestions as well, like cutting detail out of the synopsis and easing into some of the characters and changes so that the reader can keep up. This story is about two twin sisters, and No. 1 felt that while Percy's character and motivation was immediately clear, Andie's needed more work. Grade: 87 out of 100.

Judge No. 2 seemed to like it too. No. 2 liked the synopsis and the plot, really liked the physical descriptions of the first planet, Venus, and said it was a pleasure to read. The judge also said "this is a strong storyline and would be enjoyed by the readers of this genre, especially those who enjoy stories in the style of de Lint and Asmov." (I haven't read either -- perhaps I should.) But No. 2 also wanted to understand my main character, Andie, better and said the dialogue between the twins was stiff. The most interesting criticism was that the pacing was was "a bit boringly the same," with suggestions how to vary it. Despite all the positives, No. 2 graded it 61 out of 100.

So, all in all, I'm pleased with the Pretty Nervous Aardvarks and plan to enter next year. It's always encouraging to know people will take one's weird writing somewhat seriously and not send people to your house with a butterfly net.